you know that feeling when you're struggling to find a reason, so you look back at old pictures and remember the good memories you had (like these images), and all you want is to get that back even though you know what you were feeling then and it wasn't anything better than what you're feeling now... truth is, i want that back because of the good moments. i know i don't want to go through everything again, and i'm in a much better place because of the events that took place, however painful they were, but i want the good moments that seem so rare.
looking back is always 20/20, and those good moments are something i look back on fondly because they were rare and sweet and beautiful, and i would give anything to have that in this moment that i am in... but the hard reminder is that i do have those moments now, they're just different than they were, and when i'm through this, i'll be able to see them for what they were, and they'll be just as good.
it's hard to keep going when everything seems against you, i find this to be true more often than i don't, it seems, but the most important thing to remember, is that when you've stood the test, once you've gone through the trial, you will be grateful. you will look back and say 'that was good', you will be thankful for how you were stretched and grown. the person you will be at the end of this will be a stronger person than you are right now, and that's good. it's okay to not be okay, but when you're feeling completely helpless and lost, remember that one day you will look back and you'll understand why.